Did You Wait To Start A Family?

By Jen Nathan on Friday, July 31, 2009.

Women and men are having children later in life, often after they’ve established careers, bought a home, traveled the world, and achieved other milestones. Starting a family at age 40, 50 or beyond comes with its own set of joys and challenges.

Many parents pride themselves on having more economic means and a stronger sense of self later in life. Others worry about having the energy to raise a child, or share concerns about passing away while their children are young adults. Monday on Word of Mouth we'll be speaking with a woman who adopted a child in her mid-forties, as well as a journalist who has been tracking this trend.

You Tell Us: Did you start a family later in life? Share your experiences and let us know why you think mid-life parenting is on the rise. Call us at 603-223-2448, or leave your comments below.

(Photo by Preston Smalley via Flickr/Creative Commons)

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I became a mom at 42 and am the founder of http://www.motherhoodlater.com, an international organization devoted to those parenting later in life. I'd be glad to speak with you. Chapters are nationwide -- no fee to join. We have a blog, monthly newsletter, giveaways, a Forum, etc. Our mission is to connect, inform and empower those who became a mom at age 35 plus whether for the first time or again.

Submitted by Robin Gorman Newman on Sat, 08/01/2009 - 02:44.

My mother had me at age 17,and growing up in small town Vt I was determined to get out and have adventures before settling down (if ever) I traveled the US and abroad working for the airlines, worked for years at a Western dude ranch, rescued animals.I think many people want to experience adventures and pursue careers before taking on the responsibilities of being parents.Living in Florida at age 40 I met the man I would marry, from Puerto Rico.We married at 41 unsure if we could have children. We were open to having or not having kids.When I was 44, Matthew came along, conceived naturally. We are usually EXHAUSTED, I believe more so than if we were younger,and it seems weird having some gray hair AND raising a toddler.We don't know anyone our age who has such a young child.At this age I feel I am a better parent (and partner) than I ever would have been earlier in my life.We agree its the most meaningful thing we have ever done.To be honest, we sometimes feel we have lost some freedom, but on the whole we love our lives with Matthew, and raising him well is our no. #1 priority.

Submitted by Christine Phipps on Mon, 08/03/2009 - 09:57.

Even in your 30s, doctors talk about advanced maternal age and the increased risk of Down syndrome, etc. Like many, we encountered fertility issues in my mid-30s and eventually underwent IVF to have our two children.

Waiting until you own your own home, finish that advanced degree, and have a certain measure of security seem to be the kiss of death when it comes to starting a family.

I'm 42 now and blessed with a 6-year-old and a 3-year-old. Having small children makes me feel younger than I am (and the economy has robbed some of that security we thought we had). We wish conceiving our children hadn't taken so many years. All of their grandparents are gone, and it was hard to juggle babies and elderly parents, both of which have so many needs.

H.S. health classes and celebrities made it seem like everyone gets pregnant in a flash, which certainly isn't true as you get into your 30s and 40s.

Submitted by NHPR Listener 99 on Thu, 08/06/2009 - 16:46.

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Word of Mouth is all about what's new. Online and on-air, the show looks at our fascinating and ever-changing world, and puts the latest ideas under a microscope. Word of Mouth investigates everything from science and technology, to health and the environment, to new trends in popular culture. The show airs Monday through Thursday at noon and is hosted by Virginia Prescott.